How (not) to kill creativity
And prepare our children for the future
Hello and welcome to,
✨A newsletter on Creative thinking & living. A safe space to embrace the power of Creativity✨
Have you ever stopped your child from daydreaming? Do you often tell them “don’t be silly - this is not a good profession as it won’t get you money”? Have you ever said to them “don’t waste your time doing this art and craft, instead study subjects like math’s and science to get better marks and succeed in life”?
All these statements might seem normal to a parent, but for the child they can alter their thought process forever.
I still remember as a child, my career choices used to change every year. Some year I wanted to be an air hostess, and sometimes I wished to become a teacher, or maybe a designer in the coming times. But in the hindsight I was just trying to be a creative by letting my mind wander to places and explore domains. It was like playing with a toy randomly and abandoning it once I did not like it. But I never gained focus in this random act as I was never told about the choices I could make.
Instead, the world conditioned me to chose from the basket which they designed, rather than me curating my own basket which could have things I liked, appreciated or just dreamt of.
Creativity is naturally embedded in all of us ie. we all were born creatives. It’s only over time while we grow up, that we start assimilating ideas from our surroundings including our parents, to ditch creative thoughts and instead focus on the technical aspects which would bring in success ie. money (a definition given to us by the world itself and thus might not be the best that can be adopted universally). This is the thought process of majority of Indians per se, as we have been a nation of doctors, engineers and teachers essentially; and then professions like law and architecture followed suit as they were considered noble professions.
But fast forward in 2025, the dynamics of professions and careers have changed. We are no more limited to few (noble) professions, but multiple (creative and innovative) avenues have opened up which can provide us with basic necessities including food, shelter, clothing and even luxuries in some cases.
Then why we still hold these outdated conversations with our children?
And why am I doing this conversation about parenting in a creative thinking newsletter?
As this is the fundamental of how we perceive the art of Creative thinking & living.
Let me explain.
So lately, while I was chatting with my 12 year old, she said, “you know what I wish to do in future”?
I said, “What”?
She said, “I wish to do fashion journalism”.
Now, this intrigued me. A 12-year old being pretty specific that she would like to pursue journalism in the field of fashion was shocking to me (in a good sense).
I decided to dig in further.
“What makes you think this would be a good profession for you”?
She goes, “ As I love everything fashion, but I don’t wish to become a model or a designer, I think journalism would suit as it would make me be a part of the fashion industry, but in a different role”.
I said, “But do you realize, that journalism requires intense reading and researching”? (My daughter is not a reader, totally opposite to me)
So she said, “Then maybe I can become director for fashion shoots where I don’t have to read too much, but I am still a part of the industry in some manner”.
Do you observe the pattern?
She is sticking to the core idea of being in the fashion industry. At this point, she does not know which field she should chose, but she knows she wants to be a part of the fashion industry. Loud and clear!
Now, as a parent, my next action was to take the conversation deeper. So I told her —
“Fashion is a glamorous world, which looks glossy from top but underneath gets dark at times. But if you are very much interested, you should start reading and exploring about how trends work, how do designers think and design, how do they plan runways, what are the terms often used in the fashion world, so that you get some insights into the industry”.
And guess what?
I could see a beam in her eyes.
She seemed excited about the idea, and might even consider doing some basic research work.
So what just happened here.
Instead of killing her dreams and creative thoughts, I channelized them towards the process and technicalities, so that if she wishes to navigate the domain she has some starting point.
Had I done this conversation in a conventional manner, this is what it might have looked like —
My daughter: “you know what I wish to do in future”?
Me: “What”?
My daughter: “I wish to do fashion journalism”.
Me: Don’t be silly. Where do you get these hideous ideas from. Fashion industry is all about drugs, abuse and other shady things. Get this foolish idea out of your mind, and focus on your studies. Your generation is getting spoiled by watching Reels and YouTube. I would have to be strict with what all you consume as content. Now get back to your academics, and stop daydreaming.
What just happened here is a brutal death of an idea which could have actually materialized and become a profession where your child would be:
Happy doing what she likes
Good at it, as its a subject she loves and thus would put her 100% effort and focus
Create something brilliant, as she has been conditioned and trained in a manner which allows her to think creatively and evolve into a professional who started building their body of work at an early age due to the exposure, guidance and maybe mentoring + their cool technological skills
Might be even a genius (more on this in a later post)
It is very essential that as parents and adults, we guide our kids in a manner, that it allows them to make wise choices based on their knowledge, skills and thought process. We should allow them to explore, fail, learn, unlearn so that they taste all flavors and accordingly decide, what is best for them. There might be pitfalls in the journey, but that’s a part of the creative learning
We need to give wings to our children to embrace more creative pursuits, as the future would need more ingenious solutions for real world problems. AI would anyways be doing run-of-the-mill chores for us while abandoning us and making us wonder what to do with our outdated skill set and knowledge. —
Parul Kapoor
What do your conversations with your children look like? Do you encourage or discourage them? Would love to chat in the comments. Remember, it’s a safe and judgement free space, Happy reading! 😇
Creatively yours,
Parul ❤️